As a single woman, I've found that emotional support is hard to come by. I think it's probably an issue that most people struggle with, but even more so as a single person. When you're married, you have a spouse, a partner, someone who is always around. Emotional support may or may not be there, of course, depending on the strength of the relationship. That person is always there, regardless, to talk about and to share their problems.
Being single, I feel reluctant to turn to my partnered friends for emotional support. They are too busy, too worried about their own problems and that of their family unit, whatever the size. I find myself turning to my parents for emotional support, especially my mother. I don't know what I would do without her. I call her up sobbing about once a week these days because I'm having trouble(to say the least) with my job hunt.
I've needed a lot of emotional support over the past few weeks. I feel like my job search is hopeless. I am constantly passed over for who knows what candidates. I feel very helpless, and that is not a situation where anyone feels good. So, I call my mother sobbing. She can't do anything for me. I know this. She listens anyway and convinces me that all is not hopeless, though. I wonder if I am ripping my mother's heart out each time I call. I try not to do it very often, but I do get to that point more frequently than I can cope with. I have a finite amount of money, and I don't want to be a financial burden to my parents as well as an emotional burden. I've been paying my way for 6 years, and it feels like I am going backwards in terms of development.
At the same time, I've begun wondering what I'm going to do when my parents aren't around anymore because I expect to still be single at that point. I don't expect to be able to look to my brothers for support in any way. I'm the responsible one, the one who manages her money.
Single ladies who might be reading: Who do you look to for your emotional support? I'd especially like to hear from women whose parents aren't around any longer. I want to know what to do when mine aren't around any more.
Spiritwalker Trilogy by Kate Elliott
11 years ago
I may not be single but I can't always turn to my boyfriend either. Sometimes he just doesn't understand and my mother is there and I love her, but to be quite honest I don't think I could make it through bad days if I didn't have a best friend like @tashalee. We cover each other no matter what and sometimes, when we can't help...we're just there for each other and thats what matters.
ReplyDeleteYou are very lucky to have a friend like that! I have spectacular friends, but most are married with kids. I don't feel comfortable taking their time and energy for myself, so I generally turn to my mom for that kind of support. I don't want them to worry about me, so I stay quiet instead of telling them how I really feel.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, I can't help with this. I only have my mom or sis, no really close friends, especially who know my situation. So I tend to unload on my mom or my sis, both of whom are married and busy, busy lives of their own. If I can't talk to them, I pray. The majority of the time, I just need to vent and by praying I'm not hurting anyone's feelings. I can scream and holler and just let it out. Feels nice! :o)
ReplyDelete